Core beliefs are deeply ingrained beliefs we hold about ourselves, others, the future, and the world. They develop early in life through significant experiences. Core beliefs play a powerful role in how we process information. Once they develop and are set in motion, core beliefs are continuously reinforced throughout the rest of childhood and into adulthood. This is because we selectively attend to information that confirms our beliefs and ignore or dismiss information that does not support them. Due to these processes, our core beliefs only get stronger over time.
How My Life Experiences Led to Maladaptive Beliefs
I am a therapist and treat health anxiety with cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). But I also have a long personal history of dealing with health anxiety myself. Thanks to CBT, I am in a much different place today. I’ve been grateful to be able to help my clients work through similar issues that I have dealt with myself.
That said, let’s take a peek into my own history in the hopes that it might shed some light on how significant events in our lives can shape how we see the world.
For most of my childhood, things were pretty unstable. My father was abusive with substance use disorders: alcohol and meth. One day, when I was 7, my mom and little brother picked me up from school early, and we took off, forever leaving behind my father and the home we shared with him. This marked a positive change in our lives in many ways, but it was not without its challenges. We were hurt and broke, and my mom started getting terrible migraines, which only worsened over the years. Despite countless doctor visits, tests, and medical bills, we were left without an identifiable cause or effective treatment options. When I was 16, my mom died from an overdose of her pain medication.
These experiences as a child led me to develop maladaptive beliefs at a very young age, such as:
- The world is unsafe and unpredictable
- Serious disease is everywhere and unavoidable
- The field of medicine is incapable of treating diseases
- I am weak and vulnerable to disease
- Uncertainty about health is dangerous and unacceptable
Not surprisingly, anxiety kicked in around the first or second grade. While my friends at school seemed to be concerned about “normal” things like whether they were going to be able to play outside or have ice cream, I was crying about nuclear bombs and whether my mom was gonna die in a car crash on the way home from work. In general, I felt unsafe and expected the worst most of the time.
And then, around 9 or 10, the health anxiety came for me. I began to believe that serious diseases were extremely common and that those who weren’t plagued with a debilitating illness were among the lucky few. After all, if my only remaining parent is sick, then so many others out there must be experiencing something similar.
As I moved into my teenage years, and especially after my mom died, I began to assume that if someone is sick, then it is likely to be very serious and eventually terminal. Besides migraines, my mom had everything else going for her in the health department: she was young, took care of herself, had good genes, and followed all of the doctor’s orders. Yet, she still died. So, I concluded that if one is diagnosed with anything, they are as good as dead.
Core Beliefs Are Reinforced for Years
Once these health-related beliefs were solidified, then the process of reinforcement began. Essentially, I would scan my environment and selectively attend to all the pieces of “evidence” that supported my belief system.
- I paid special attention to situations when one of our relatives got sick or when I learned that a friend’s family member was sick or dying.
- I read all about various diseases in medical texts.
- I was overly focused in health class and became especially interested in the most deadly diseases we covered.
- I watched as many tragic movies and TV shows about the sick and dying as I could get my hands on.
I was so busy seeking out sickness and death that I failed to acknowledge that, aside from my mom, everyone in my life was pretty healthy and, well, alive.
Of course, these beliefs just progressively strengthened over the years. How could they not? In the world I had created for myself through all these activities, everyone was sick and dying. I remember, at one point as a teenager, thinking about how lucky I was that I had escaped sickness and death. I laugh at that now. Here I was, a young person with virtually no health issues, and I believed that my survival was some kind of miracle. It demonstrates just how biased and inaccurate my thinking had become through this whole process.
Your Homework
Your own life experiences that contributed to your health anxiety may not be as obvious or cliche as mine. But I am guessing if you did some digging, you’d find some situations or events that have significantly impacted you. Your health anxiety is likely the culmination of a variety of experiences. It can be helpful to understand what triggered the development of inaccurate beliefs. Still, it is much more important to identify what your beliefs are and how they have been (and are currently being) reinforced in your life. I’d like you to try to look at your own life through this lens and see what you find.
Consider the following questions:
- What significant events happened in your life? Did you or someone you love struggle with illness and/or die? Did you experience any adverse or traumatic events? Did it seem as though you were living in an unsafe and unpredictable world?
- How did these events shape your beliefs about health and illness? Grab my guide for a description of unhelpful core beliefs about health. Do you think any of these beliefs were influenced by the things that happened in your life?
- How were these beliefs then further reinforced/strengthened over time? Can you think of examples like those that I gave in terms of how I sought out information that supported these beliefs?
Remember, beliefs are not permanent. They can be reshaped. Doing so involves retraining or rewiring your brain to learn how to process information differently. You first learn how to identify all of the pieces of “evidence” that you think support your maladaptive belief. You then take the opportunity to reframe some of these pieces of evidence and challenge any inaccurate assumptions. Next, you want to develop a new, healthier, and more adaptive belief about health and begin to seek out evidence for that new belief.
Put some thought into this exercise. Gaining new insight can serve a positive purpose.