Have you ever sunk into the couch at your therapist’s office, given a report of the week, and scheduled for next week without a sense of knowing where you are going in therapy or how well you are getting there?
Psychotherapy is an intensely individualized experience. With therapeutic interventions ranging from the rapid eye movements of EMDR meant to assist in processing trauma to the exploration of person-centered therapy, a session between any given client and any given therapist is bound to be as unique as a fingerprint. And some sessions may be more productive than others.
Research has sought to identify the attributes that lead to the most effective therapy. Measuring outcomes in psychotherapy is tricky, as what individuals seek through counseling varies wildly from person to person. Some are on a quest of self-discovery, an incredibly subjective journey. Others look to change behaviors, like decreasing alcohol use. Still, even for these individuals, tackling the reasons behind their addictive behavior goes deeper than a simple number of drinks.
Research suggests that having a secure therapeutic alliance and agreement on therapy objectives may be most critical to the success of therapy (Wampold, 2015). The match between client and clinician is especially important, both in ability to connect and expertise. Someone who might be an excellent therapist for one person might not be the best person for another.
Here are four things that you can do to ensure that you are getting the most out of therapy.
1. Find a Therapist You Click With
Working with a therapist you connect with is essential so you and your therapist are aligned on your therapy goals. To some extent, this is intuition. Sometimes we know intuitively whether we have found someone who we can relate to or not. Other aspects might include personality and style. For example, some therapists are very active in integrating activities and between-session tasks to achieve therapy objectives. Others take a more non-directive stance as you explore together. Many therapists offer an initial consultation session, or phone call, sometimes at no cost. This can be one way to evaluate how strong the match is.
2. Clarify Your Goals for Therapy
For therapy to be effective, both the client and the therapist must be on the same page in terms of what the goals are. If you don’t know exactly what you want to get out of therapy, that’s okay! Your therapist can assist you in sorting this out. The question, “What would you be doing if the problem that brought you to therapy was not in your life,” can be a catalyst in mapping this out.
3. Log Insights Between Sessions
There may be times between sessions when something happens that would be helpful to discuss in therapy. If not written down, however, these can be easily forgotten. Some types of psychotherapy, such as dialectical behavioral therapy, use logs or ‘diary cards’ that track thoughts between sessions. If your therapist has not provided you with such a tool, a short list of topics to approach in therapy can suffice.
4. Take Action
Typically, we only spend one hour in psychotherapy a week and the rest we spend living our lives outside of therapy. Yet most people go to therapy to improve some aspect of their life. Even if someone wants to decrease anxiety or depression, there is usually a more concrete reason as to why, for example, setting out to work through anxiety so that one can attend more social activities and strengthen relationships. Committing to practice the skills discussed in therapy or moving toward making the changes you desire outside the therapy room is vital to translating progress in therapy to the rest of your life.