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You know those moments when you had a stressful day, you haven’t eaten, you’re tired and wired, your children are fighting, and you feel like you could lose your mind? Don’t you wish you had a magic formula to calm down quickly?
Well, there is one, and research backs it up.
Jake was a Marine Corps officer in charge of the last vehicle on a convoy going across Afghanistan when he drove over a roadside bomb. When the dust cleared, he noticed his legs were severely injured. This level of trauma and excruciating pain usually results in fainting pretty quickly.
But Jake actively prevented himself from going into shock.
How?
With a breathing technique.
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As he began to practice it, he regained his presence of mind. It allowed him to maintain his ability to think clearly and perform his first act of duty—check on the other servicemembers in his vehicle—and his second act of duty—to give orders to call for help. It even gave him the presence of mind to tourniquet his legs and think to prop them up before falling unconscious. He was transported urgently to Germany, and then to Walter Reed Army Medical Center, where he was told that had he not done those things, he would have likely died.
Jake’s injuries were so severe that he lost both his legs. But he is alive, has a family, and is well. All this because he knew how to calm his nervous system in minutes, thanks to a breathing exercise.
If breathing can help Jake remain emotionally sovereign in one of the worst circumstances we can imagine, can it help us with our lesser stressors? I’ve devoted part of my research career to this question.
Because in a fast-paced time when we need things to work, work well, and work fast—breathing is key.
We all know how to breathe, of course. Our first act of life was an inhale, and our last will be an exhale. Between those pivotal moments, we will take roughly 20,000 breaths a day. That should make us breathing experts, yet most people don’t realize the profound potential the breath has for mental health.
How we breathe impacts our physiology, well-being, and cognitive function: our heart rate, blood pressure, emotions, and memory. Our breathing patterns influence the function of many critical areas of the brain. Breathing influences how we perceive the world, think, pay attention, remember, and feel. Our neurons respond to the rhythm of our breath: When we alter our breathing, we can control the activity of our brain cells.
And that’s why breathing is the foundation of emotional sovereignty.
You’ve probably noticed how hard it is to talk your way out of intense emotions like anxiety and anger, let alone a traumatic situation like the one Jake was in. It doesn’t work. And that’s where breathing can make a real difference.
Research shows that different emotions are associated with distinct breathing patterns and, here’s the kicker, when you change your breathing you can change your emotions.
See that?
When we change how we breathe, we can change how we feel, as Jake did.
How can you calm down quickly next time you feel stressed?
Slowing the rhythm of your breath—especially your exhales—can initiate relaxation. It calms your heart rate and stimulates the vagus nerve, which runs from the brainstem to the abdomen and is part of the parasympathetic nervous system (the “rest and digest” system). You start to calm down. You feel better. And your ability to reason returns.
Try this exercise:
Breathe in until your lungs are full (to a count of four, for example), and then on the exhale, try to breathe out for longer than you breathed in—ideally a time and a half or two times as long (to a count of six or eight). Do this with your eyes closed for five minutes and notice the aftereffects. I’m curious to know what you find!
If you’re anything like the thousands of people I’ve taught, you’ll feel calmer, with your mind clearer and more present.
To train yourself for greater calm, try a full breathing protocol we studied in students and veterans.
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